If I Grow Up. Shouldn't that be when?

If I Grow Up by Todd Strasser

Synopsis: In the Frederick Douglass Project where DeShawn lives, daily life is ruled by drugs and gang violence. Dropping out of school and joining a gang is the norm and every kid knows someone who’s died. Gunshots ring out on a regular basis.

DeShawn is smart enough to know he should stay in school and keep away from the gangs. But while his friends have drug money to buy anything they want, DeShawn’s family can barely afford food for the month. How can he stick to his principles when his family is hungry?

In this gritty novel about growing up in the inner-city projects, award-winning author Todd Strasser opens a window into the life of a teenager struggling with right and wrong under the ever-present show of gangs.

Review: I am going to be brutally honest with my review of this book. At first reading, I couldn’t stand it. The first chapter was so brutal in its description of the dead gang-banger. Now, not brutal for an adult novel, but this is aimed at young teens and I found this difficult to grasp. The descriptions were depicting a harsh world, one I don’t want my children to see. One I don’t want them to know of... or do I?

DeShawn’s world could not be further from that of my own upbringing. I lived with my parents – DeShawn with his grandmother. I knew nothing of gang culture or death by violent means whereas for DeShawn, this is an everyday occurrence. DeShawn has decisions to make at the age of 12 that I still don’t have to make aged 33.

This book is not an easy read. It is uncomfortable reading if you remember this is based on situations that happen for young boys in the US (and in the UK and all over the world) every day. Though if you’re not happy with feeling uncomfortable then just forget the realities of life and enjoy the story. However, if you do this, I think you may have missed the point.

I started off by saying I couldn’t stand this book. By the end I couldn’t let go of DeShawn. I wanted to go into his life and haul him out of it. I wanted to hold him, shake him and give him a way out. But for most DeShawns of this world, there is no way out. This is a gripping read for all age groups. Most importantly, get your children to read this. Teach them that gangs are dangerous. Teach them what life is like for some of their peers. Don’t let them learn the hard way.